Last Words
by Aeshna Lacrymosa
Summary: It was a moment of clarity. Certain that he was at the end of his life, Nick had chosen his last words.
1. Chapter 1

While Nicholas Wilde had never exactly expected to live a very long life, he hadn't really anticipated staring death in the face at the age of thirty-three. It was a cool and dim February afternoon that he and Judy Hopps had responded to a call regarding a manic bull. For a moment, they thought it was a rogue night howler situation again, but when they had heard the bull screaming profanity and strange verses, they breathed more easily.

It wasn't the first time that Officers Hopps and Wilde had had to take on much larger perps. But they were also painfully aware that it was never easy. That day, it was a horned auburn coated bovine called a betizu. Because of the creature's body mass and tough hide, it took a while for their tranq darts to take effect. They were in the process of calling for backup when the bull charged. Nick and Judy leaped out of the way. Possibly drawn to the vivid red of Nick's fur, the bull snapped his head at the fox.

Nick didn't even feel the horn impaling his chest. It actually felt like one of Judy's jabs—except that Judy was about six feet away from him and screaming in horror even as she shot a few more darts at the bull. As if on instinct, Nick grasped the part of the horn sticking out of his chest. Nick realized too late that he should have let go of it when the bull tossed his head, causing the horn to withdraw and then stab him a second time. Another toss of the bull's head, and the fox was flying and then falling.

Nick only felt the pain when he had landed on the floor. He heard the blood splattering from the exit wound on his back, felt the hot liquid soaking his fur and his uniform. Crying out, he brought his paws to his chest and felt the blood pouring from the sickeningly deep wound.

"I'm here, Nick. I got you." Judy looked as scared as he felt. Then, Nick looked around him. Fangmeyer and Wolford were carrying the bull to their own cruiser.

It hurt to breathe. He felt cold. He tasted blood and felt it filling his throat. "Carrots …"

It was surreal to lay there helplessly while coughing up blood. Part of him wondered if this was a nightmare he was eventually going to wake up from. Then, Fangmeyer and Wolford came to help Judy. Nick focused on the stripes on Fangmeyer's face for a moment—something to concentrate on, to draw his attention away from the pain—while the tigress tore his bloody uniform open. Fangmeyer looked horrified at the sight of the wound. Nick also heard Judy gasp and whimper. Nick tried to keep focusing on Fangmeyer's stripes, but the pain intensified while Wolford and the two ladies rolled him onto his side and treated his wounds. Nick couldn't even scream, just grimace and reach for Judy, who held his trembling paw.

The panic set in when his vision lost focus and his hearing became muffled. He was shivering violently, both from the fear and the strange cold that had taken hold of his body. Nick tried to tell himself that he was in good company, but it was difficult to be scared when he could taste his own blood and was practically drowning in it. Each inhale was as painful as a new stab in his chest. "I'm here, Nick," she said as she squeezed his paw. "We're all here for you."

He looked at Judy's face. Her cute bunny face was set in concentration while they waited for the paramedics to arrive. He tried to squeeze her paw but found he had little strength left. Judy—she had barged into his life and transformed it forever. There were so many things he wanted to say—so many things he still wanted to do with her. Perhaps it was enough to hold her paw like this.

His eyes welled with tears with his affection for her. Nick shut his eyes and endured the pain to try to breathe. He saw Judy cringing as she heard his shuddering gasps. Nick blinked and focused on Judy's brilliant violet eyes—perpetually filled with hope and wonder—idealism she had restored in him. Feeling her soft white palm in his paw, Nick felt thankful that he was going to die an honorable cop, not the shifty hustler that he had been for twenty years.

In one moment of clarity, Nicholas Wilde knew he was ready. "Judy," he whispered, "I love you." Certain that he was at the end of his life, Nick had chosen his last words. There was no better way to leave the world than letting Judy know he loved her without the shroud of humor—just naked, blood-and-guts truth. He was determined to go out having gotten it off his chest.

Judy face crumpled. "I love you, Nick," she mewled. She looked like she was going to say something else, but nothing came out except an anguished cry. Wolford pulled her aside and took Judy's place trying to slow down the bleeding. "No goodbyes, Wilde," he warned. "You're gonna stay and keep saying that to her, alright, buddy?"

The last thing Nick saw was Judy sobbing as Fangmeyer held her.


	2. Chapter 2

"You ready, Hopps?" asked Fangmeyer, snapping Judy out of her terrifying memories of Nick bleeding in her paws. It was about an hour later, and the tigress had taken the bunny back to the precinct, so both of them could get cleaned up before seeing their downed colleague. Judy nodded vaguely, her eyes distant.

"Hey, Fang," squeaked Judy, "I'm sorry I lost it back there. I was going to stay calm and everything, but Nick …" Judy's throat seemed to close up as she fought the urge to cry again.

The tigress smiled weakly at her smallest coworker. Fangmeyer knelt and held Judy's paw between two fingers. "I wasn't going to call you out for it, Hopps," said Fangmeyer. "No one will, not even the chief. What happened with Wilde is hard for you especially. We get it. Now, let's go see if he's alright. Chief Bogo is there now."

It was not the first time that Judy or Nick had been injured in the line of duty, but this was less easy than the others. It broke Judy's heart to see Nick's mother distraught and helpless in the hospital while Chief Bogo tried to comfort her. It hurt her to see the beautiful vixen's green eyes bloodshot from crying so much.

Chief Bogo gave Judy the week off, knowing that she wouldn't be able to work while having to deal with the uncertainty of Nick's survival after such a traumatic experience. It was small relief that Nick had barely survived the ordeal though the night of the attack and the nights that followed had been the most difficult time in Judy's life in recent years. She had asked to stay with her sister in her family's home in the Meadowlands. Slightly taller and slenderer than Judy, Carlie strongly resembled their father Stu though she had pale brown fur and dark ears and muzzle. She was wearing a lavender cardigan with a tangerine dress when she arrived in the hospital.

Judy was no longer the only Hopps rabbit to live in Zootopia. A few of her older brothers and sisters had also moved to Zootopia to pursue agricultural opportunities. A twenty-seven-year-old agricultural engineer and mother of twenty-seven kits, Carlie lived in the Meadowlands with her husband Greg Caraway, who was an architect. Judy was grateful that they didn't mind having her over. Being Aunt Judy to Carlie's little bunnies was a pleasant distraction from the constant worry for Nick. Even better was being allowed to be a little kit again when she needed a hug from her big sister. A familiar touch was a much needed comfort instead of being alone with the horrific memories of Nick being so close to leaving her forever. Judy was exponentially relieved that Carlie never judged her once, never questioned the affection she carried in her heart for the fox. Carlie didn't completely understand the relationship, but she knew that Judy had a sound mind and a big heart, and wouldn't settle for anything less.

It took all of Judy's patience to wait. It was all she could do besides coming to visit Nick every day. His mother was always there. Mrs. Wilde was fond of Judy. After the muzzle incident, both she and her son had been somewhat wary of prey, but Judy was the first prey to see Nick as the good and earnest individual that he was. Returning to the Meadowlands every night was the hardest thing for Judy to do. Every time, she would look at the window to the ICU and whisper, "I love you."

It was four days after the attack that Judy was woken up by a very excited Carlie. "Hurry, Judy, get up!" she said, grinning. "Nick is awake!" Judy nearly went out wearing pajamas. An hour later, Carlie was driving while Judy lovingly held a basket of Hopps blueberries. When they had arrived, Chief Bogo and a few other officers were there, including Fangmeyer and Wolford. Fangmeyer was smiling knowingly at Judy when she saw the rabbit coming. "He was looking for you," she purred.

"Really?" asked Judy while Snarlof the polar bear took the blueberries to put it on the bedside table.

"Carrots," said Nick's weak voice. Judy gave Snarlof a smile of gratitude as she hopped onto the bed, which was sized for a wolf. Nick's smile reflected her own relief and joy. It warmed Judy's heart to see his brilliant green eyes again. Judy was vaguely aware of their colleagues backing out of the small room when Nick lifted his paw to pet Judy on the chin and her cheek. He still smelled of blood and medicines. Nuzzling into his palm, Judy put her paws on his smooth snout. "I brought you blueberries, so you'll smell like blueberries again," she said, giggling.

"Hopps," he whispered. Nick blinked slowly as he slid his paw behind Judy's head to draw her closer. Judy didn't hesitate to lay on his shoulder and weep. She wanted to tell him how scared she was this whole time, how helpless she was while she waited. She wanted to say how often she relived that terrible evening and how she couldn't get his words out of her head. But all she could do was wail into the cream-colored fur of his neck to let out all the stress and terror and relief and joy all in one go. She could feel Nick's fingers and claws on her folded ears. Then, she felt him sobbing softly.

Judy lifted her head. She had never seen Nick breaking down like this before. "Judy," he said weakly. "I was so scared I could never see you again."

"It was the same for me, Nick," she mewled, petting his snout and his ears. "You are precious to me."

Nick put his paws on her back and her waist and held her like a doll. "Wolford was right," he said. "I'll keep telling you I love you. And when the day comes I'll actually die, I'll say it again."

"As long as you're here, you can say it whenever you like," said Judy. "I know I will. I love you."

"I love you," echoed Nick. "I always will."


	3. Chapter 3

"Boom!" said Judy, slapping the ticket writer with glee. "Two hundred tickets before noon!"

Parking duty was light work, and Chief Bogo had thought it best to put Judy in parking duty for two weeks while Nick was in recovery. On any given day, this would have irked the little rabbit, but now that she knew that her friend was going to be alright, she was filled with newfound enthusiasm—even more than she had on her first day. The insults that frustrated civilians threw at her did not faze her either. At the end of the day, she was going to see Nick. She was going to look into his green eyes and when she would touch his fur, he would feel it.

Past noon, when she was not paying attention, thinking of Nick occasionally became unpleasant. The soft fur under her paws would become sticky and matted with blood. The green eyes would lose focus and then close. Judy gasped and blinked in the sunlight. It was alright. It was now weeks since the attack. The bull that had stabbed Nick was in the psych ward while Nick was going to be released soon.

Later that day, when Judy was getting ready to leave the precinct, she changed into her casual outfit in the locker room. "Hey, Hopps," said Fangmeyer in her deep, husky voice as she gently clanged her locker shut. "Are you going to the hospital? I pass by it on the way to my place. I can drop you off."

"Oh, thank you, Fangmeyer!" said Judy.

As Judy buckled herself up on the front passenger seat and feeling a lot like the doll she probably looked like to the tiger, Judy thanked her colleague again. "I really appreciate this, Fangmeyer," said Judy. "It's been a little tough to be alone. I guess I'm so used to being with Nick all the time."

"How tough?" asked Fangmeyer, giving Judy a look of concern as she started the vehicle.

"Well, I had a flashback today, in the early afternoon," said Judy. She cringed. She was not used to telling anyone about her low points. But knowing that Fangmeyer had been there when Nick had been injured, Judy trusted Fangmeyer. "It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it happens when I least expect it, regardless of my mood. And today, I was in a very good mood."

"You might want to let the chief and Clawhauser know about that. You don't want it impeding on your work. But don't worry. The other guys and I have been through that before. It doesn't last."

They were at the hospital shortly after that. "Say hello to Wilde for me," said Fangmeyer.

"I will!" said Judy, waving happily before she hopped into the building.

Judy found Nick stretching his arms and legs in his bed. He was groaning in apparent pain while his joints crackled. "Easy, Wilde," said Judy.

"Hi, Mrs. Wilde," she said to the vixen sitting at the foot of the bed.

"Hello, Judy," she said happily as she hopped off the bed and gave Judy a motherly embrace. "I'll leave you two alone." She smiled at her son before strutting out of the room.

"Hey, Carrots," said Nick, laying back down on the bed. He lowered the volume of the TV, which was showing a silly reality show at the time. "Had fun at parking duty?"

"Surprisingly, yeah," said Judy, hopping onto the bed and giving Nick a gentle hug.

"Saved any shrew princesses today?" asked Nick, flashing a knowing grin.

"Just 320 cars," said Judy. Smiling softly, Nick reached up to pet Judy behind her head and at the base of her ears. Suppressing a moan when Nick hit a sweet spot near her neck, Judy said, "Wow, how do you learn to do that?"

"I used to offer massages to my classmates in the high school track team and theater troupe," said Nick smugly. He guided Judy's head to his shoulder and kept petting her.

"I like it when you get touchy-feely," said Judy nuzzling Nick's neck. "How much did you charge?"

Nick's fingers stopped moving while he took a moment to remember. "Let's see. Two dollars for shoulders, additional two for head and neck, five for back, three for hands and arms. Thank God nobody asked for foot massages. I guess we all had an understanding how intimate that is." Nick's paw moved to her back, making her shudder.

"This already feels pretty intimate," said Judy stretching her arm across Nick's chest. "Does it hurt?"

"Ooh, yes," said Nick. "Almost every movement I make, it just hurts. But I've been able to get up and take walks. I miss doing pull-ups though. Am I getting scrawny?"

Judy playfully squeezed Nick's biceps with both paws. "Still not as scrawny as when I first met you," she said, nuzzling him again. "Well, I miss working with you. Are you okay being here?"

"With my mom hovering over me, I feel like a little kit again. Not that that's a bad thing—I think my mom misses having to take care of me," said Nick.

Judy giggled. "I look forward to when things go back to normal."

"Yeah, me, too. You sure you're okay?"

Judy sat up and smiled weakly at him. After a moment of hesitation, Judy confessed: "I had a flashback."

Nick frowned and held her paw.

"Do you get those, too?" she asked. "It just came out of nowhere while I was working. I was so happy and looking forward to coming here. And then, suddenly, I was back Downtown and trying to save you while watching you pass out."

Nick sighed sadly.

"Fangmeyer said it's not forever. But it's still horrible. I know for a fact that you'll be okay, but my mind makes me feel things that seem more important than they should be," said Judy.

"I know. I get it," said Nick, squeezing Judy's paw gently. "I get nightmares about it, too, usually when my wound aches while I sleep. And like you said, I know for a fact that I'm all patched up and healing, but the initial scare is taking a while to go away."

"Oh, Nick," said Judy, nuzzling his cheek. "That makes me wish I can be with you all the time."

"Me, too," said Nick. "That's why I've been looking into apartments we can share."

Judy lifted her head suddenly, her nose twitching with surprise.

"Yeah," said Nick, tapping on his phone. Then, he showed her a map with apartment units for rent. "I've been looking into these while I'm here doing nothing much else."

Judy chuckled. "Now, there's something we have in common: You and I both hate being idle."

"I might love my beauty sleep, but this is ridiculous," said Nick.

"Well, with new battle scars, I bet all the vixens in the city would be all over you," said Judy.

"Not with the smell of rabbit all over me," said Nick, "which I like a little too much." Nick carefully propped himself up with his elbows to smell Judy's neck. She had been all over Savanna Central and Downtown and a fraction of Sahara Square to exceed her quota like she always did. A few more sniffs, and he could almost taste the sweetness of carrots and a salad of flowers and berries. Being this close to her now counted as one of the best things in the world. He nearly trembled as he tried to resist licking her. His mouth watered. He wanted to bite her.

Judy wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Her nose twitched and her ears slowly folded back at the feel on his breath through her fur. "Is this why you want us to move into a new apartment together, to get more of this?" she quipped.

"Even when I'm battered up like this, you drive me wild," Nick said with a glint of desire in his eyes.

"Easy, Nick," said Judy. She appeased him with a quick kiss before guiding him back down on his pillow. She sighed softly as Nick grimaced in pain.

"Sorry," he whispered. "Too much?"

"Not really," said Judy. "The feeling is mutual, actually." She laid her head on his shoulder.

#

A gray-and-blue streak kept rushing past the edge of Nick's line of sight as he slipped parking tickets on one car after another. Unlike Judy, Nick didn't actually mind parking duty, and it was a step up from weeks of filing work. Even with the orange clown vest on, it was nice to be in the sun and surrounded by the constant color and movement of the city. The dark filing room that Chief Bogo had chained Nick into had worn out its welcome well into his second week in there, mostly because Judy hadn't been there with him. At the time, she had been working with Fangmeyer, whom Judy had become close to.

Until parking duty today, Judy would meet up with him telling stories that Fangmeyer had told her, about what the ZPD had been like before the Mammal Inclusion Initiative. Some of those stories Nick had already heard from the wolf officers. Their favorite was the one about a young Officer Bogo, who was, at the time, one of the few prey officers in the force; like Judy, he had worked extremely hard to become the illustrious chief of police he was today. Glancing at Judy standing on the hood of a large mammal's car, Nick mused about how, in spite of the lingering discrimination in the city, Zootopia was still a better place now than before.

On a normal day of parking duty, Nick would have been racing alongside Judy slapping tickets on as many cars as he could. But while he was now in far less pain than before, he was also far from perfect working condition. He smiled fondly at the boundless ball of energy at the end of the block somewhere in Savanna Central. It was hard to remember the horrors of that evening and the crazy bull in this beautiful morning and an even lovelier rabbit not far from him. Nick mostly drove the jokemobile while Judy dashed from one block to another until it was time for them to go back to the precinct and then home.

It had now been a few months since the attack. They had since moved into a new apartment together, closer to the precinct than either of their previous apartments. It was located Downtown, near Pack Street Station. Near Happytown, Pack Street, as its name suggested, was a neighborhood densely populated with predators. While the bouncing bunny got more than a few stares for working and living with her natural enemy, none of it fazed her. Even a few wolves and coyotes would take a second horrified look when the fox followed after the bunny through the door.

But once that door was closed, the rest of the world stopped to exist. All Judy saw was the one she loved most, his precious heartbeat against her cheek as he embraced her. To look up at his green eyes and not be afraid was exhilarating. To feel comfort from his teeth on her ears and his claws on her back was bliss. No words were needed for them to know what they shared.


End file.
